Lift / Elevator

25 Oct 07

As much as I like the getting-from-A-to-B-in-your-own-sweet-time aspect of stairs, it can sometimes be a bit of a drag going up and down them – I specifically refer to the four flights of which I have to ascend/descend to get between the place where I ostensibly “work” and the exit to the street. I therefore, on occasion, opt for the lift. This, however, comes with its own particular set of issues. There is, for example, to the gamble one takes, upon the pressing of the call button, with respect of certain personages who may suddenly appear with the intention of what may be referred to as “lift-sharing.” Sharing a lift can be okay – if, that is, you are in the mood for meaningless chit-chat, and it is done with someone who you feel reasonably comfortable engaging in meaningless chit-chat with. In accordance with the proverbial Law of Sod, however, this is often not the case. Picture the scene…

  • You are tired, upon the conclusion of “one of those days” at work.

  • You decide that walking down four (or indeed five or six or perhaps more) flights of stairs is just too much effort and you quite frankly can’t be bothered.

  • You decide to take the lift.

  • You press the call button.

  • You have been spotted pressing the call button by Your Irritating Colleague (you are not yet aware of this fact).

  • As the doors to the lift whoosh open, Your Irritating Colleague appears on the scene. By this time, it is too late to change your mind and take the stairs after all, as it would be obvious to Your Irritating Colleague that you would be doing so in order to avoid enduring Their Irritating Chit-Chat.

  • Your Irritating Colleague smiles (irritatingly) at you.

  • You smile (insincerely) back.

  • You enter the lift, closely followed by Your Irritating Colleague.

  • The next twenty seconds or so feels like the longest twenty seconds of your life (or thereabouts) – this, compounded with the fact that you are tired and perhaps a little stressed (on account of the “one of those days” which has mercifully just concluded), puts you in a bad mood for some time thereafter.

  • You wish you had taken the stairs.

Lifts! :-/

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